You know that sex is good for you, right? For many of us, it is far more exciting than getting on the treadmill, and can be just as exhilarating as bungee jumping, depending on how much of a leap you want to take.
WebMD says sex has all kinds of benefits such as; helping to keep your immune system humming (ha!), boosting your libido, improving your pelvic floor (so you don’t pee when you sneeze), lowering your blood pressure, lowering heart attack risk, lessens pain (orgasms can block pain), can ward off prostate cancer, improves your sleep, eases stress AND you can burn approximately five calories per minute — so taking your time with it can help to burn off that muffin top.
Daily Mail claims that a half hour of sex is, “Roughly the same as playing doubles tennis, or walking uphill, for 20 minutes, 33 minutes of golf on a driving range, 40 minutes of yoga or 19 minutes of light rowing.” “Indeed, research is now showing that sex provides a ‘triple-whammy’ of benefits by combining a workout for the heart and lungs, the release of hormones that could lower stress and the production of new brain cells. And – for women – the added plus is a toning effect on the muscles in the pelvic floor.”
I can attest that having sex with your spouse provides the conduit to a healthy relationship but many are filled with dread at the prospect of introducing intimacy into an already overly scheduled day, especially when that day is filled with people and children making high demands on you. Exhaustion sets in and arousal is the last thing on our minds as the day comes to an end. Yes, there is a button that can be pushed but unfortunately it is not always accessible. We don’t feel that we need sex in our lives, and yet our ears perk when we are privy to hearing about, or watching other people’s sex lives in books, films or TV shows like Fifty Shades of Grey or Desperate Housewives.
So how to fit it in when life creates barriers for those intimate moments, especially if a couple has children. Spontaneity is wonderful but the opportunities do not arrive as often as we would like. Let’s exit off this trail of ennuis and get the heat on, shall we?
1. If you have family that lives nearby, don’t be afraid to get on your hands and knees and beg your parents, siblings or nieces and nephews to take your kids for the evening so that you can enjoy a night of intimacy with your spouse.
2. Promise that you will return the favor. It will be worth it. Write the date down, in ink, on both of your calendars.
3. Communication is another great tool to find intimacy again. Talk to your partner and ask them what is their favorite time or place to have sex. The seed will be planted and just the thought of it could spur on flutters in your kundalini.
4. If night time is too exhausting for you, and not your time to show your amorous affections than let your spouse know what time would be better for you. If it is in the afternoon, schedule dates to meet at home at lunchtime. If it is morning, than set your alarm half an hour earlier than usual to fit in some good loving time.
5. Do not underestimate the importance of showing your partner how much you still are attracted to them. Flattery and affection work wonders on a relationship.
6. Don’t be mystified by the word “romance”. Be creative but don’t knock yourself out, keep it simple. It takes so little to show that you care. A note or sexy photo slipped into your spouse’s wallet setting a time for intimacy later, would suffice.
7. Another way to increase your affections is to try to fantasize about meeting your partner all over again. Create exciting, forbidden scenarios in your imagination and see if that doesn’t spark your desires.
8. Be careful, sensitive and caring and try to stay in tune with your partner’s needs. If you are not in the mood when they are lavishing you with affection be careful not to make them feel rejected. Let them know you love them but at the moment you need to switch off and read that book or watch that tv show and suggest another time that would be more suitable for you.
If you follow this list you may find that you are looking forward to these interludes. Be prepared to feel more frisky due to the increase in your intimate times together. What could be more fun than knowing that your partner is daydreaming about you while at work. If you do plant the seed, don’t forget to act upon it later and deliver the goods.
Life is too short to not enjoy the pleasures that we once shared with our spouse. Do your best to bring the best natural, high back into your life and don’t be surprised by the new spring in your step, and your relationship.